I finally got around to watching the show Mad Men (I highly recommend you check out this show). It’s set in 1960, and apart from having a great storyline and some juicy characters, what strikes me more than anything, is how far we’ve come in the last fifty-odd years.
You see, everyone in this show smokes and drinks 24/7—some of them while driving and even while pregnant. And the sexism is shameful. Women are cleverly compartmentalized by men—they are secretaries, “good time slutty girls”, or dutiful wives and mothers (the ultimate dream back then for women). And the men view cheating on their women as a normal and healthy part of manhood.
Of course, you and I know that life in 2012 is not all squeaky-clean or equal. But there’s no denying that we’ve made huge strides. Even in my own life, I can think back to a time in my early 20’s when I used to smoke and drink too much, when I used to cheat and lie in my relationships, when I used to think that I should be subservient to men in order to impress them, or when I used to think that I had nothing of value to say.
The big question I love to ask is: what causes people to CHANGE?
If you want to improve your life, make more money, attract the perfect mate, build a better career, become more powerful, gain more confidence, and be more successful, there are endless self help books you can read, coaches who can coach you, exercises you can follow, and courses to take. Knowing HOW to do something is the easy part. What’s difficult is, how do you cause transformation in your life? Now that’s the million dollar question.
Here is how transformation has worked for me:
1. Suffering was a huge catalyst. The seed of causing my life to change, always began with knowing what I did NOT want and WANTING something better for my life. I just got so fed up with suffering, feeling small, feeling unhealthy, feeling unclean, and feeling pinched off from abundance.
2. I made up my mind that I wanted to change. I made a decision. I had intension. I kept my focus on the result I wanted. The thought of going back to a life of suffering, kept me on focus.
3. I armed myself with information, knowledge and advice on how to bring about change. Most of it came from self help books, therapy, and getting coached by people who had themselves experienced transformation.
4. I internalized that information. I didn’t just read and listen, I practiced daily. I was persistent. I always reminded myself that anything that was difficult would cause great results. Repetition was the key.
5. I kept my integrity. Whenever I was out of integrity, I always reminded myself that it was slowing down the process. Why would I want to put the breaks-on to getting what I wanted?
Everyone has the opportunity to read and interact with the same content, the same great advice, the same great people, but so few really experience the transformation they say they really want. You may have tons of self help books, but if you’re reading them the same way you read a newspaper, then you can expect to become at best, a very informed reader.
It really comes down to two things: would you rather READ about sex, or EXPERIENCE sex? It’s really that simple.






